carmen_lj: (b5 - a funny romance)
[personal profile] carmen_lj
This is fic. It are a gift for [livejournal.com profile] nerdcakes or [livejournal.com profile] jekesta. I forget who wanted it, but, yes, IT ARE NOT GOOD FIC AT ALL DO NOT READ.

kthxby

A Quantum Leap crossover story thing:

Quantum Crossover

“You’re kidding me, right? Right?” Silence. “Al!”

“Jut give me a second, Sam. I have to double-check what Ziggy’s telling me.”

“Triple check it.”

“Yeah, yeah, no, he was right the first time.”

Sam pointed to the window. The window that looked out into space and down onto a dusky yellow world. “That is not Earth, Al. And I’m pretty sure we hadn’t achieved interstellar flight when I left. How did I get here? What on…what in Earth’s going on?”

Al shrugged, and took another look at Ziggy. “I really don’t know, but Ziggy’s pretty sure about who you are and what you’re doing here.”

“But how did I get here?”

“Ziggy’s not saying.”

Sam took a deep breath and then took a seat. “Fine. Just tell me what he does say then.”

Cigar in one hand, Ziggy in the other, Al began to read, “You are Ambassador Londo Mollari, representing the Centauri Republic on the space station-”

“Wait a minute, I’m not even human?” He shifted in his chair. “I thought things felt a bit weird down…well.. right, what else?”

“Space station Babylon 5. It’s like this great big United Nations in space and there’re all these races here talking and trading, but they’re not fighting. That’s the important bit.”

“So I’m here to stop a fight?”

“Um, no, hang on, I’m getting to it.” He hit the heel of his hand against Ziggy, took a puff of his cigar, and said, “Right, so the first four stations were destroyed or disappeared.”

“Disappeared?”

“Yeah, disappeared.” He glanced up at Sam. “That’s all it says, just disappeared. Anyway, apparently unless you do what you gotta do here, then the same thing’s going to happen to this station. Well, it doesn’t disappear, but it does get blown up. And there’s a quarter of a million people on this thing, Sam.”

“So what do I have to do to stop it?”

“Well, you, Londo, aren’t really a very nice guy. You’ve, um, allied with some pretty nasty people, started a war, bombed a planet, killed thousands of-”

“Alright, Al, I get the picture.”

“Right, so, your lot, these Centauri, really don’t like this other lot, called the Narn. And they’ve got an Ambassador on the station too. He’s called….” He give Ziggy a shake, scowled, then shook him again. “He’s called G’Kar. And the two of you have sort of a love-hate thing going on, where you really hate each others guts but kind of avoid killing each other because you like arguing…um…something like that anyway.”

“Uh-huh. So this has got something to do with this G’Kar then?”

“Right.” There was a long pause. A suspiciously long pause.

“Al?”

“Right…right…you’re not going to like it, Sam.”

“I’m in the future in an alien body. I don’t like it already.”

“Well, Ziggy says you have to…have to…to spend time with G’Kar.”

“Time?” asked Sam.

“Yes, time…” Al took a deep breath. “Intimate time.”

“What?” Sam’s face was blank for a split second before he realised Al was attempting tact. “You mean I have to…”

“Yes.”

“With another alien?”

“Yes.”

“As an alien.”

“Yes.”

Sam rubbed his forehead, quiet for a few moments before he got up and looked for a mirror. He stared as his reflection a moment, said, “Nice hair.”

“It’s pretty distinctive,” said Al. “You gonna be alright?”

“I don’t think so, I…” He frowned, shrugged off his jacket. “Al…what are…” Something moved under his shirt. “Al, what are these?”

“Hang on,” he said, looking for answers on Ziggy.

Sam unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it off. “Al, I’ve got tentacles!”

Al looked up from Ziggy, and managed, almost successfully, to hide any amusement he may have had regarding the tentacles. He coughed. “Those are your…” He waved an arm in a gesture that was obviously meant to convey some meaning, but it meant precisely nothing to Sam.

“My what?” asked Sam.

“Your…” The arm wave again. “You’ve got six, you see.”

“Six? Six what?”

“Six.”

Al was saved from a great deal more hand-waving and repetition by the door chime. Sam grabbed his shirt, pulled it back on, while Al went to take a look outside. He reappeared, and said, “And that’ll be Ambassador G’Kar now. Good luck, Sam.”

Sam took a deep breath, arranged his shirt as neatly as he could and approached the door.

“Oh, boy.”
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